Anger – Assertive, Passive & Aggressive – Article
There are three main types of communication
“I’m wrong, you’re right You matter, I don’t matter”
You win, I lose
Passive people don’t usually tell other people how they feel. This means that things don’t get sorted out and that the person doesn’t always get what they want. Anger can build up and sometimes passive people can get really angry over something little because they have been holding things in for ages.
“Both are points of view are important, neither of us is wrong. I matter and you matter”
We both Win
Assertive people will tell others how they feel and what they want but they will do so in a respectful way and they will listen to the other person’s point of view. An assertive person tries to work towards a solution where both people get what they want. An assertive person uses ‘I’ statements, doesn’t use blame or get aggressive.
“I’m right, you’re wrong I matter, you don’t matter”
I win, you lose
Aggressive people will tell or show other people how they feel. However, they way that they do this is usually unhelpful. They may shout or use intimidation to make their point and they rarely listen to the other person’s point of view. This can damage relationships with other people and may not always get them what they want.